Oregon Mediation Center

The Peacemaking Option For Divorce And Dissolution Of Domestic Partnerships: How Family Scientists Support Interest Based Conciliation And What This Means For Separating Couples (7/26/10)
Thurman W. Arnold III
The family sciences offer an approach for facilitating conciliation of the seemingly conflicting interests and needs of divorcing couples, and those dissolving domestic partnerships, that may be adapted by legal and other professionals to the task of mediation and peacemaking. By understanding the crisis of divorce, family scientists may help educate lawyers, and the clients themselves, to become peacemakers.

Reconciliation: Moving Past Divorce (7/26/10)
Dina Haddad
After separation and during the divorce process, you likely have become angry, resentful, and hostile towards your spouse. When our relationships become threatening, such as a damaged marriage relationship, we protect ourselves by forming a negative image of the other person. This negative image helps us live on with our lives, without experiencing psychological disintegration.

On Non-Alternative ADR (7/26/10)
Arnold W. Zeman
To a considerable extent, family law is about family breakdown and the disagreements that follow. No one thinks that courts of law are the ideal place to deal with these matters. But though the concept of alternative dispute resolution has been in currency since the 1980s, many of the attempts at it have still been very much inside the court context – what might be called “non-alternative alternative dispute resolution.

Marital Agreements Upheld in Massachusetts (7/18/10)
John Fiske
The Supreme Judicial Court of Massachusetts on July 16, 2010 answered in Ansin v. Craven-Ansin the long-deferred question of whether a marital agreement should be recognized. The answer is "yes." Their reasoning centers around the spouses’ freedom to contract, "permitting the parties to arrange their financial affairs as they best see fit.”

Learning To Forgive In Divorce (7/12/10)
Dina Haddad
Often overlooked, divorcing spouses struggle to forgive their spouses and themselves. This inability often prevents them from being able to reach an optimal settlement, whether in mediation or litigation. Dina Haddad sets out a guideline for divorcing spouses to begin the forgiveness process in the context of the divorce setting.

Ireland- Lawyers Urged To 'Buy Into' Mediation (7/12/10)
Jeff Thompson
he Chief Justice and many other judges have expressed their support for the wider use of mediation in family law – and, indeed, other – disputes, and provision now exists in the Commercial Court for cases to be adjourned for mediation. The Legal Aid Board has taken steps to increase use of mediation by its solicitors. Yet the proportion of family law cases being mediated remains low, partly because of lingering suspicion of the process among lawyers.

Mediation on TV (7/12/10)
Keith Seat

In the fictional, but undoubtedly influential world of NBC’s The Office, a mediator is brought in to resolve a contract dispute between characters Dwight and Angela to produce a child. The mediator apparently determines the legitimacy of the contractual arrangement between the parties who then reach a sexual solution to their conflict that may be unique in real life contract disputes.

Frothy Girlz.com (May 15, 2010)

“Happy Wife, Happy Life” and Mediation (7/05/10)
Laurie Israel
Did you ever hear the expression “Happy Wife, Happy Life”? This overused adage seems to help some people (generally husbands) focus on their wife’s happiness in order to secure a peaceful, happy marriage. Surprisingly, the concept may have some academic support.

Why Biased Mediators Are Essential In Child Custody Disputes (7/05/10)
Erica Becks
Let’s face it; most humans are hard-wired to be somewhat self-interested. In many ways, self-interest is a survival mechanism, which ensures that our needs are met first. However, the purpose of this article is not to decide whether we as humans should or should not be self-interested. What I would like to explore, is what happens when self-interest begins to hijack the child custody mediation process?

Joan Kelly: Describing the book "Surviving the Break-Up" - Video (7/04/10)
Joan B. Kelly
Joan Kelly talks about the central themes of her book, "Surviving the Break-Up". These include: impacts on children of different ages, impacts on the parents, reactions to the visiting relationship post-divorce, developmental impacts and behaviors over time.

Tom Stipanowich: Mother Influenced Value of Peacemaking - Video (6/18/10)
Tom Stipanowich
Tom Stipanowich explains how his mother was the peacemaker in his household and how that influenced his decision to work in the conflict resolution field where he feels most comfortable.

Divorce Mediation: A Tool For Empowerment (6/13/10)
Dr. Lynne C. Halem
Why do individuals choose to mediate their separation, divorce, or post-divorce issues? For twenty-eight years, we at the Centre for Mediation & Dispute Resolution (CMDR) have been tracking the responses of our clients. Here’s a sampling of what they tell us:

Constance Ahrons: Old Dissolution Model Was Damaging - Video (6/13/10)
Constance Ahrons
Constance Ahrons discusses the pre-joint-cutody model for the relationship between Ex-spouses. The cultural norm was to have no relationship, because that meant that the ex-spouses where hanging on.

Divorce Presents Many With The Opportunity For Fresh Start (6/07/10)
Cynthia M. Fox
Divorce is, quite literally, a termination point. A union of two lives, whether over several years or just a few months, comes to an end. At that moment, one road travelled together ends and two new roads must be built and navigated separately.

The “Accidental” Mediator (5/31/10)
Phyllis Pollack
Sometimes, the goal of a mediator is not to settle the case but simply to prevent the dispute from escalating into all out war. I was reminded of this recently by getting into the middle of a dispute between two friends who have been separated for many years and now wanted to finalize it by a divorce. The only issue was the property settlement. To be noted well, I am not trained in family law, am not licensed to practice law in the jurisdiction in which my friends lived and being close to both of them, I have a huge conflict of interest (“Disclaimer”).

Joan Kelly: Families Closer Post-Divorce - Video (5/31/10)
Joan B. Kelly
Joan Kelly describes a research finding which concluded that families who mediated during the divorce had father's who were significantly more involved in their children's lives twelve years post-mediation.

Chip Rose: Mediation and Collaborative Law - Video (5/29/10)
Chip Rose
Chip Rose notes that the field of collaborative law is in its adolescence and there is tension between the collaborative law people who think they are creating something new when in reality mediators have been helping divorcing couples for decades. The history and experience in the mediation field is not always fully appreciated and valued.

Child Support Duty To 18-Year-Old Not Graduated From High School (5/24/10)
Nancy Caplan
In 2002, Maryland lawmakers revised the law extending the “age of majority” as it relates to child support, from 18 years old, to 18 years old and graduated from high school, but in any event, no longer than age 19. [i] Thus age 19, for child support purposes, is the outer limit of the “age of majority.” [ii]

Curiosity Is Everything (5/17/10)
Debra Synovec
Curious mind. Cpen mind. Responsive mind. All three advance your divorce settlement conversations.

Nina Meierding: Cultural Sensitivity while Training - Video (5/07/10)
Nina Meierding
Nina Meierding discusses her approach to mediation training in other countries. This involves being culturally sensitive, not imposing the Western model as it may not be useful for other cultures and their ways of problem-solving.

Andrew Schepard: Challenges Within Family Mediation - Video (5/07/10)
Andrew Schepard
Andrew Schepard discusses challenges within family mediation: domestic violence, cultural differences and parties' expectations of the mediator, and a need to pre-screen violent parents.

Divorce Mediation: A Tool For Empowerment (5/03/10)
Dr. Lynne C. Halem
Why do individuals choose to mediate their separation, divorce, or post-divorce issues? For twenty-eight years, we at the Centre for Mediation & Dispute Resolution (CMDR) have been tracking the responses of our clients. Here’s a sampling of what they tell us.

How Celebrities Divorce Is A Choice. Mediation Offers Them A Better Option (5/03/10)
Lee Jay Berman
One of this week’s most talked about legal issues is whether or not Larry King will divorce his wife Shaun Southwick. Last week the media speculated about the state of Tiger and Elin Woods’ marriage. The week before it was all about Sandra Bullock and Jesse James, and the week before that Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller. Next week another couple with a marriage in crisis will take the spotlight amid accusations of cheating, disclosures of prenuptial agreements, divisions of millions in assets and child-custody battles. Like many failed marriages, however, when the focus goes away the discussion about those matters will remain toxic.

Mediating A Divorce Sometimes Leads To Saving A Marriage (4/26/10)
Cynthia M. Fox
In this and my next article, I will tell you of two situations where the mediation worked so well that instead of ending their marriages, the couples involved recommitted themselves to preserving their marriage.

How To Settle Your Own Divorce: And Never Set Foot Inside Of A Courthouse (4/26/10)
Erica Becks
Yes, you read right. Clients are often astounded when I tell them that 1) arranging their own divorce is possible and 2) is a relatively straightforward process. If you or someone you know is looking to save themselves the time and heartache of litigating a divorce, please read on.